A Cold December Eve
by wired2damoon
Summary: Its the first Christmas Sirius has to spend alone in Azkaban. In his cell he casts his mind back to that unforgettable night, the night he lost everything... his friends, his home, his dignity and his freedom...


-1**A Cold December Eve**

**By wired2damoon**

**Chapter 1:A Cold December Eve**

**Disclaimer: Nothing is mine bar the plot yada yada yada characters belong to JKR blah blah you get the rest!**

**A/N: Hi everybody! I'm wired2damoon and here we have my 4th fic A Cold December Eve! This follows the thoughts of one Sirius Black and his first Christmas is Azkaban. I might consider making this longer and not a one-shot but I kinda need encouragement from you the readers so please upon fished reading leave me a review whether you think my story is good/bad/awful I don't mind! But I do hope you find it enjoyable and that's how I'll leave it! ENJOY! **

It was a cold, darkened December Eve in the hard stone walls of Azkaban Prison. Harsh wild snow circled down onto the grounds making stiff loud thud as it hit the ground.

The inhabitants within the tall black towers threw their hands over their ears trying to protect themselves from the manic noises.

One man in particular buried his head in his knees and rocked back and forth muttering, "for Merlin's sake pull yourself together man!"

As a strong gust of wind hurtled towards the barred celled window, the Azkaban Prisoner Sirius Black was thrown at the cell door with a hard and heavy thump.

"OW!" he yelled out in agony as his cuts and bruises were exposed to yet more pain and suffering. He glanced down at his torso and huffed at the sight of a freshly laid wound weeping trinkets of dark red blood.

Sirius Black had been an inhabitant of Azkaban Prison for near two months now. It had been by far the worst two months of his entire life, and Sirius's life had been far from easy.

Growing up in a power-hungry pureblood family wasn't such an easy task. With an abusive father, an alcoholic oblivious and naïve mother, a smothering uptight star crazy brother and a cheeky house-elf life for Sirius Black was about as bad as could get.

He never showed his desperation at having such a terrible family however. In fact as soon as he entered the Hogwarts Express which would take him to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry he completely put his guard up.

Hidden were his physical wounds which he received daily from his father, hidden were his emotional scars trashed upon him by his mother, hidden was the torment he insisted didn't bother him by his brother and the unruly gestures he received from that blasted house elf.

As he sat there his back rested on the hard iron door he began to remember his first day at Hogwarts fondly smiling to himself as he did so.

FLASHBACK

_After enduring a harsh talking to from his parents about the importance of being in Slytherin the eleven-year-old Sirius Black boarded the Hogwarts Express._

_He had heard about the gleaming train and how it was supposed to mesmerise people who glance upon it for the first time and Sirius had to admit it was pretty impressive._

_Sirius was never one to abide by rules (as most of them were set by his father) so he knew that he was going to have tonnes of fun at Hogwarts. He couldn't wait to break every rule in the books just to see the look of hatred and disappointment on his dear old mother's face._

_He wanted to spite his parents and get back at them for everything they ever did to him, everything they ever said to him, and everything else he shuddered to remember._

_All Sirius needed was the right accomplice, partner in crime, friend._

_"Hey, do you mind if I sit here everywhere else is full?" (A/N: Line from PS movie Ron says to Harry) Sirius glanced up to find a raven-haired be-speckled boy with dark hazel eyes staring down at him._

_"Um, yeah sure", he replied watching intently as the boy sat down opposite him. "I'm Sirius, Sirius Black", muttered Sirius extending his hand in gesture of introducing himself. "Oh yeah, um, I'm James, James Potter", answered the boy shaking his hand lightly. Sirius smirked at James and James smirked back and for some unknown reason from that moment on they both knew they would be friends…forever._

END FLASHBACK

Sirius felt his eyes sting as he remembered the first time he ever met his best friend James. Sure he had heard about the infamous James Potter and his father the greatest Auror who ever lived, and his family one of the richest and most powerful pureblood families ever, but that was the first time he had ever formally met him.

Starting that day he and James had done everything together, enrolled in Gryffindor together, played Quidditch together, didn't do homework together, hexed Snape together, pulled pranks together, got detention together, hit on girls together made friends together.

Sirius cast his mind back to when he and James made friends with two other people that day, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew.

He laughed as he remembered Peter, the man who ruined his life, he remembered how he welcomed him and protected him, oh how could he have been so stupid?

And to think he actually thought his other best friend Remus Lupin was the spy. How he hated himself for ever thinking such a thing and for underestimating the dark cold mind that was Peter Pettigrew.

He could never mask the guilt he felt for the part he played in James's and Lily's deaths. He had persuaded James to change his Secret Keeper from him to Peter as he thought the Dark Lord would not be expect it, when in fact this is exactly what he expected and exactly what lead him to the Potters.

Sirius shut his eyes tight as he started to think back to that faithful night that was the start of the end of Sirius's life as he knew it.

FLASHBACK

_Sirius paced around Godric's Hollow as Lily and James watched him with batted breath. "Sirius, what's wrong? Why have you come here?" Lily asked as she bounced her and James's one year old son Harry on her knee._

_"I've come here Lily because I've had an idea. I think that maybe it would be best if you changed your Secret Keeper, I'm too predictable", he answered in a rush while still wildly pacing._

_James's eyebrows rose in surprise. "What? We can't change our Secret Keeper Sirius! You know we trust you, who else are we supposed to trust?"_

_Sirius stopped pacing abruptly and stared down at his best friend, "um, well how about Remus?"_

_Lily and James glanced at one another as Lily replied, "well Sirius don't you think Remus has enough to worry about, you know with the Werewolves regrouping? And well besides we know information has been leaking out about us and well I hate to say it as old a friend as Remus is it very well could be him letting it leak. I mean who else would it be?"_

_"PETER!" roared Sirius as Lily ,James and Harry all jumped in surprise at his sudden outburst. "What you mean? Is Peter is leaking information about us?" asked James who was the first to recover from shock taking Harry off Lily as he began to cry._

_"No James! I mean you could change your Secret Keeper from me to Peter! Its perfect I mean Voldemort will never expect it! Of course he'll expect me to be the Keeper but not Wormtail I mean c'mon he's weak and easily frightened, old Voldy will never suspect a thing trust me!"_

_END FLASHBACK_

And of course the Potters did trust him and made Peter their Secret Keeper which was the second day of the start of the end of Sirius's and indeed James's and Lily's lives.

Being imprisoned in a cell on his own for the last few months Sirius had a lot of time to think to himself. He wondered about many things. He wondered what life would be liked if the Potters hadn't changed Secret Keepers? He wondered would they still be alive? Would he be in prison? Would Peter still portray them?

All these questions he knew he was asking in vain when really he should be asking, is Harry ok? Are the Dursley's treating him well? Who will Harry grow up like, James or Lily or both?

But instead Sirius found himself wallowing in self-pity at his own misfortunes. He was being framed for crimes he hadn't committed and no one believed him. He wondered if Remus believed him? Probably not but he still remained hopeful.

Sirius stood up and glanced out the bar lined window at the blizzard that seemed to be forming outside. He knew it must be coming up to Christmas, he had marked his days here by carving a line with a jagged rock on the stone wall.

Upon counting the lines Sirius concluded that it was now indeed the 24th of December…Christmas Eve. He had been here a total fifty-four days, twenty three hours, forty five minutes and twenty nine seconds but hey who was counting eh?

This meant that was indeed Christmas Day is less then fifteen minutes. As he concluded this Sirius began to remember a particularly happy Christmas he spent with his friends in his Seventh year at Hogwarts.

FLASHBACK

_"OH C'MON SIRIUS YOU GREAT PILLOCK GET YOUR ARSE OUT OF BED RIGHT NOW IT'S CHRISTMAS FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!" cried an frantically impatient James Potter tugged at his foot in attempt to pull his out of bed._

_"Goooff awaway yooouuu prat", muttered Sirius into his pillow the word "Prat" being the only word James could make out._

_"SIRIUS I MEAN IT GET THE HELL UP! IF YOU THINK FOR ONE SECOND I'M MISSING EVANS IN HER CHRISTMAS ROBES JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE ONE LAZY BASTARD YOU'RE CRAZY!"_

_Sirius stifled a laugh as he heard the desperation of his friend's voice. "Evans will chastise you if she catches you drooling all over her… again! I'm just saving you from getting slapped…again, so really you should be happy I'm a "lazy bastard" as you so kindly put it", cooed Sirius rolling over onto his back and smirking up at his friend who was now beginning to lose all self-control._

_"SIRIUS YOU BETTER GET UP OR SO HELP ME MERLIN I'LL KILL YOU! HAVE YOU ANY IDEA HOW EVANS LOOKS IN THOSE ROBES I MEAN SERIOUSLY!"_

_Sirius tutted loudly, " all right fine, you win as always now where's my robes?"_

END FLASHBACK

Sirius laughed out loud as he reminisced on that moment in time. That Christmas morning had been one of the funniest events ever. Not only did James yet again get slapped by Lily, but he ended up slipping outside on the Hogwarts Grounds and breaking his leg which made Sirius and Remus crack up in hysterics.

He remembered how fun that Christmas was, opening his presents with his friends, venturing into Honey Dukes and nicking some chocolate frogs and various other favourites, and playing Exploding Snap and Chess into the wee hours of the morning.

Sirius knew he was just torturing himself by constantly reminding himself of everything which was lost, but he knew it was what was keeping him sane. He heard that the people in Azkaban barely kept sane for twenty four hours let alone nearly fifty-five days.

But there was one difference between him and every other inhabitant in Azkaban…he was innocent. Something that he was willing to prove, not only to the Ministry but to one other person, Harry.

As soon as the Peter framed him Sirius knew people would grow up bad mouthing him as the murderer of thirteen muggles , Peter Pettigrew and the portrayal of his best friends Lily and James Potter. One of these people who would believe these lies would of course be Harry.

Sirius wasn't even sure whether Harry would grow up knowing he is a wizard as was his parents. From the information he got from Lily about her sister she wasn't the most kindest person when it came to magic. He hoped that day were treating him well and he made the right decision letting Hagrid take his bike and fly Harry to the Dursley's.

Somewhere out on the grounds the loud clanging bell sounded eerily floating towards Sirius's cell announcing twelve o' clock and snapping Sirius out of his daze. "Twelve o' clock, my first Christmas Day imprisoned in Azkaban", thought Sirius "and probably not my last", he finished sighing to himself sadly.

That night as Sirius Black glanced around his four confined walls he promised himself something. He didn't know when and he didn't know how, but one day he would make it back to Harry and let him no the truth. He was innocent and he risked his life and freedom for his best friends and if he had the chance he would do it all over again. James and Lily were his family and he Harry was all he had left, all he cared about. And with that one last bitter thought Sirius shut his eyes tight and lay down on the floor hoping that on his first cold December Eve imprisoned sleep would not take too long to come.

**A/N: Well everybody what did ya think? Good, bad, happy sad? Please let me know by reviewing!! It keeps me going! Hope you enjoyed and can't wait to hear what you think! Luv wired2damoon xxx:o)**


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